Why to be hesitant in calling a Spade a Spade? The tale of Rohit and Chitra.

By - Abhudai Pal 

So do you abuse? Asked Rohit to Chitra, 

Do you mean assault? Replied Chitra

Not assault, so let me be precise with my question. Do you use swear words? Asked Rohit again to Chitra,

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She replied, "No," with a smirk. 

In a way, Chitra was right. The word abuse carries deeper meaning rather than just the use of "swear words." 

With such stupid talks, the familiarity/friendship between both of them evolved. 

Rohit was a person whose notion of romance was akin to the ideal love stories of the world. Rather than dreaming of one night, his ideas of romance were poetic, abstract, and hard to find. He knows that such expectations of the world are irrational. 

Despite knowing everything, this was one aspect of his life in which he did not want to compromise. He wants his partner to be ideal and his love story to be as devoted, dedicated, and passionate as Heer and Ranjha, Romeo and Juliet, etc. 

Slowly and steadily, like every other stupid guy who dreams of an ideal partner, he fell for her friend Chitra. Stupid because his intentions were pure. Such a fool! And that was not love at first sight. He controlled himself, took cues, and analyzed things before falling for her. 

Rohit talked a lot with Chitra when with her and about her when with his friends. And Chitra was also responding. Both had talks till 4 am and walked till midnight. They watched movies together. They discussed almost everything under the SUN. 

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He remembered the tiny details/problems related to Chitra and tried to solve them within his realm. 

He reminisces that, once when I clicked her pictures at a most beautiful spot in the city. 

"No one has ever done this for me," replied Chitra. This sentence of her melted me. 

Well, from all the little things elaborated above. You can assume that things were on the upside for Rohit. He considered all the cues and events that unfolded for a time. He was kind of optimistic and behaved as if "I found a Love" was playing in his brain on loop. 

However, all of a sudden, without any reason. Chitra did not respond to Rohit. As I said previously, Rohit was rational, so before calling, he used to drop a text whether to call or not? When the response was positive, he proceeded with that. 

So as per response, he called, and the call remains unanswered. Although a "Shakt-Ladka," who never calls someone unnecessary. But someone who has fallen for someone uses his emotions instead of reasons. 

So he called continuously despite no response. Stupid! Cent-percent stupid. 

Then Chitra told her friends how Rohit was irritating her by calling continuously. In a way accused Rohit of mentally harassing her. When Rohit learned this from external sources, he was furious, not because his calls irritated her, but because she chose to say it to everyone rather than saying it to him. 

Rohit recalls in agony that she was not irritated when I called for random things and talked for hours? She was not annoyed talking with me till 4 am. She was not upset about accepting gifts brought by me. She was not irritated when I called her to know if she needed something. 

This was depressing for Rohit. However, being a follower of Marcus Aurelius, he thought to let it go. Until now, things were so worse that no one wanted to talk to each other. 

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Rohit thought to normalize things so that, at least in gatherings, we can smile and wave to each other and not let the vibe of the entire group be disturbed. Alas, Chitra was poor from the heart that she did not have a smile/wave to share with Rohit. 

With this, the story ends. 

The story might have ended. But crucial lessons are about to unfurl. 

Rohit did not lose just a girl. What Rohit lost is the spark to fall for someone again. To believe that the person he aspires for does exist. He forgets to approach anyone as he never knows when things will become irritating. 

Moreover, For him, it was never about bragging about his girl. He wants a partner with whom he can communicate without any propriety. 

If it was about SEX, He could be happy with any girl. After all, to have SEX, you do not aspire for a partner. You need a human with the opposite/same genitals as yours, as per your preference. 

And for Chitra, it was nothing new. Her hobby is roaming/exploring new men. And Rohit came to know this after being burnt in the fire. Because when the heart fails, brains work at best. In a way, She was a man-eater. 

For her, there is no meaning in 4 am talks, receiving gifts from someone, going on a hangout, or talking secrets. Further research by Rohit reveals that she is a champion of victimhood. An outstanding sympathy gainer, and thus every stupid boy, to calm her victimhood, became the victim itself. 

He came to about knows ten guys himself, later!!! 

What might be the correct word for such girl(s)? A Slut? 

You might think this is misogynism. But no, I use the same word for a male, too, whose hobby is playing with girls' emotions. 

You will think that this is shaming someone. But I believe it is not. It is the categorization of a few society members so that it's easier for other members of society to find their flock. 

A question for you. Don't you call someone a thief if he/she theft you, a fraud if he/she practices fraud with you, or a cheater if he/she cheats you? You do. Then why not do the same with individuals who are slut/playboys. Is that a crime? 

Moreover, the over-forgiving nature of people like Rohit and other individuals incentivizes people to continue their behavior as they are not afraid of being shamed. And if you sing, you should call yourself a singer. What is to be ashamed of in that? 

Pic credit to the rightful owner.

And to be honest, Playboys/Sluts should be proud of their act(s). They should proclaim it so that the Stupid guys/girls like "Rohit" stay away from them. They should be proud of their achievements in exploring/exploiting sincere relationship seekers. 

Besides doing the above, Sluts/Playboys should convey via language/code that they do not represent love. They are cravers and carriers of lust. By doing this, you relieve yourself from the responsibility of relationship/love, which many stupid persons like Rohit want. 

To Rohit,

You can not fill a vessel until it is emptied. It might be challenging, but not impossible. And be a person with whom you want your daughter/son to date. Be a representative of love, not of lust! And since Rohit's intentions were pure, he does not lose anyone; everyone loses him. 

The percentage of people in this world like Chitra is very few. If they were in significant numbers, then the earth would have been deprived of love, loyalty, trust, emotional stability, and the magical connection which often couples share. 

Relax for a time but not allow someone like Chitra to defy your notion of love. 

Remember the question Rohit asked Chitra in the beginning? 

Do you abuse? 

Chitra actually understands the word's deeper meaning because she practices it. She does abuse. Not as "use of swear words," but as assaulting someone mentally. How come a person practicing a word forgets its meaning!!

Practical Wisdom 

We should call a spade a spade. 

Always use brains, be it for love or other aspects of life. 

Do not allow anyone to defy your notion of love. 

There are good/bad people in life. The former is meant to stay, and the latter gives lessons for a lifetime.